Of course, people may not understand how your relationship works and you can’t go around basing the quality of your relationship on whether other people like the two of you together. But if everyone is telling you to get out, you should at least consider that they have a good reason for doing so.
You’ve suffered physical and/or psychological abuse, financial exploitation, sexual abuse or degradation from your partner past the point of damage to your health and safety. [1] X Research source Your partner constantly pressures you to do something you’re not comfortable with, such as being part of a dangerous or criminal activity. Harsh ultimatums and threatening statements are all signs of a potentially dangerous relationship. Don’t fall for the “If you really love me, you’d do this. . . " trick. Endless strife or despair has taken over the major areas of couple functioning – communication, sex, finances and emotional support. Jealousy becomes a major issue. A relationship becomes unhealthy if your partner tries to put restrictions on who you hang out with, when, and for how long. Your partner is not in control of your social life; you are. Your partner has been involved in long-term alcohol or drug abuse/addiction that they can’t break free from and your life, or your children’s lives, have suffered markedly because of it. You are involved in long-term alcohol or drug addiction that you can’t break free from. You aren’t doing anyone any good by staying in the relationship. Your relationship was based on superficial foundations that no longer work, such as partying, shared hobbies, or sex without love, and you are ready to move beyond these things. Your partner tries to control what you wear and how you look. It is your body, your face, your hair, and your wardrobe; you decide what to do with it.
If you’re still a teenager, then yeah, your life goals may change and you have time to think it over. But if you need to start planning for your futures now and there’s no possible intersection, then it may be time to rethink the relationship.
If you are being manipulated or controlled, then this is one of the rare cases where you may not want to break up with the person face-to-face; if you’re afraid of a violent reaction if you end the relationship, do it from a distance and have a friend help you pick up the pieces.
Your partner’s lack of respect may be more subtle. Maybe the person pokes fun at certain aspects of your looks, makes jabs about your career, or hints that you’re not very good at something. That’s still disrespect – big time.
It may take you a minute to realize that you have been doing something that you were not comfortable with, because you were just trying to get in the swing of things.
If this is something so big or bothersome that you simply can’t get over it and the person won’t change, then it may be time to end the relationship. [7] X Research source Maybe you and your partner come from different religious backgrounds. If your partner refuses to convert and so do you and religion is very important to you, then this may indeed be a deal breaker for you.
If you think your issues are the problem, then talk to your partner about them and see if you can find a way to work through them together. You may also want to talk to a therapist about your issues so you can work through them with a professional.
Something similar is if you are only in this relationship for popularity. That’s never a good reason to date someone, and you should be with someone you actually like rather than someone popular. If you know that the relationship has no real future for you, then ending it as quickly as possible will be the best thing you can do for your partner, because you’ll be giving them the chance to heal and find a more fitting relationship in the future. Though it’s ideal to end the relationship during a calm time, don’t keep holding off because of a birthday, a wedding, Valentine’s Day, Christmas with your family, or a million other reasons that would make it “inconvenient” to be broken up. This can go on forever and there is no perfect time to end a relationship (though some are, of course, better than others).
Sure, some people are more shy than others and some situations can be more fun without your significant other, but generally, you should be proud of the person you’re with and feel excited to show them off. If you’re not happy about other people seeing you with that person, then how can you be happy in the relationship?
If you enjoy the first few days but then find yourself missing this person and feeling like your life is incomplete without them, you should probably try to repair the relationship.
There is a core foundation of similar values and beliefs that you share, especially spiritual and moral values. You still trust each other; you know your partner is on your side and have faith they will work with you for the greater good of your household. Hard times have taken over suddenly without giving you time to find your center. Health problems, trauma, financial problems, addiction regressions and depression can come on in an instant and make things look really dark. Give it time, let the smoke clear, and try to be a friend to each other until it’s over. You are caught in a negative response cycle where negative behavior triggers more negative behavior. Break the cycle by gaining control of your own negative reactions, call for a peace treaty, and give your partner time to get a handle on their negativity. You have a tendency to run from commitment at the first sign of trouble. Take some time to cool down and work to become friends again. Commit to friendship, remember what you used to like about your partner, and act like you care. It’s good for you to see if you can stick through the problems for once, no matter how it ends up. You have drifted apart slowly and suddenly discover you are living with a stranger. This generally happens due to neglect, so work on it - talk, listen, spend time together and see if you can rediscover love.
