Break the touch barrier and make light physical contact, you might start by massaging her hand. Get caught looking (briefly) at the other person’s lips. Don’t purse your lips. Keep them softly parted — not so much that you could breathe comfortably through the opening, but enough that you could bite your bottom lip easily. Make your mouth appealing. Use chapstick or lipgloss to smooth over flaky lips, and keep your breath fresh with mints or spray. Avoid gum, which you might have to spit out awkwardly if the other person goes in for a kiss. [1] X Research source
If you’re kissing a girl: Take her hand and slowly lift it to your mouth. Gently press your lips into the back of your hand for 2 or 3 seconds before breaking away. If you’re kissing a guy: Lean in and plant a 2- or 3-second kiss on his cheek. Keep your lips soft, and avoid puckering like you would if you were kissing a family member. If you want your intentions to be extra clear, aim for the part of his cheek just to the side of his lips.
Say it in an intimate way. Lower the volume and tone of your voice slightly, and lock eyes. Not only does this communicate that you have deep feelings for this person, it entices him or her to come closer to hear you. Focus on an alluring quality. Even if you truly think that your date is an amazing basketball player, now might not be the best time to bring it up. Instead, base your compliment on how you see your date as a romantic partner. Try these lines: “You are SO beautiful. " “Your eyes drive me crazy. " “I love to see you smile. " “I am so lucky to be with you right now. "
“I’d love nothing more than to kiss you right now. " “I’m sorry if this is too forward, but I’d really like to kiss you. " “I want to kiss you so much that it is just about killing me. "
Try to avoid letting your lips smack. The noise can be distracting, and might break your immersion in the moment. If you do find yourself smacking, slow down and part your lips a bit more. Stay light at first. Avoid smashing your lips against your date’s mouth — for now. Kissing softly and gently gives the other person the chance to stop if it’s uncomfortable, as well as allowing you to gauge his or her interest. [3] X Research source
Your lower lip Your partner’s lower lip Your upper lip Your partner’s upper lip At first, putting your partner’s lower lip between yours is the safest bet. Most people have larger lower lips, making them easier to grab gently with your lips.
Don’t feel self-conscious about being out of breath or needing to take a break for a second. Breathing hard is an indication that you’re nervous and excited, which your partner will probably find flattering.
Place your hands lightly on your partner’s shoulders or around his or her waist. (In Western culture, girls generally put their hands on a boys shoulders while he puts his hands around her waist. ) Take the intimacy up a notch by pulling your partner in closer. Put your hands on the sides of his or her face, using your thumb to sweep across the cheekbone, or put one hand under his or her chin and tilt it upward. Another seriously sensual move is to put both hands around the back of your partner’s head and tangle them in his or her hair, gently pulling.
See how your partner responds. If he or she presses in closer or returns the gesture, you’re probably clear to keep increasing the intensity of the kiss. If your date pulls away, maybe it’s best to pull back the tongue for now and stick to lips-only kisses. [6] X Research source
Sweep your tongue along the inside of your partner’s lower lip. Try to move slowly and lightly at first, increasing speed and pressure only if your partner seems to respond well. Slide the tip of your tongue inside your partner’s mouth and gently move it against the tip of his or her tongue. Use light, darting motions and keep your tongue moving — letting it sit limply in your partner’s mouth isn’t appealing and will bring a quick end to the kissing. [7] X Research source Try deeper and harder strokes if your partner seems responsive.
Alternating your technique will keep your partner from being able to predict what’s coming next. Maintaining this sense of surprise and spontaneity helps your kisses avoid becoming stale.
Keep the pressure as light as possible. Remember that you’re aiming to nibble, not bite. Move slowly. Again, keeping your pace gentle will help prevent accidentally chomping on your partner’s lip. When your lips are locked, place your teeth over your partner’s lower lip and slowly pull back until your teeth are almost at the end of the lip. Pause for a moment, then resume kissing as usual. Don’t break out the biters too much. They should be an occasional perk, not the main attraction. Be prepared for rejection. Not everyone likes a side of teeth with their kisses. If your partner doesn’t respond well, try not to be too offended — it’s probably a matter of personal taste, not a lapse in your technique.
Instead of putting a damper on the action, these small moments can actually make kissing more intimate. It gives your partner the sense that you see him or her as a complete person, and not simply something to kiss.
Keep in mind that an awkward first kiss isn’t the end of the relationship (or the world). Actually, it can build intimacy through having a shared experience. As long as you can laugh it off, you’ll be fine. Remember, everyone has gone through having their first kiss. Odds are that most people are more awkward about it than you’ll be, even if you don’t know it.
Knowing that your mouth is clean and appealing can help you feel more confident about kissing. That being said, though, don’t feel like you need to obsess over cleanliness. Most mouths just “taste” warm, unless you’ve recently eaten something pungent (like onions or garlic) or you’ve just woken up in the morning. [10] X Research source
Guys, this is when you get the dreaded last-minute-turn-and-kiss-on-the-cheek routine, which is second only to the phrase, “You remind me of my brother,” for most-deflating date ending. As you walk your date to the car, the door, etc. , put your hand (or a jacket) on your date’s shoulder or back. This breaks the touch barrier, gently lets your date know your intentions, and gives you an excuse to stand very close all at the same time.
If the eye contact becomes too long, break and reestablish it as necessary; it’s better to let your eyes dart around than subject your date to an interrogation-style stare down. One good way to break eye contact while maintaining the romance is to glance down at your date’s lips It may feel awkward to make your desires so clear, just remember that by giving your date a heads-up, you will make the kiss go much more smoothly and improve the odds that it will turn into a glorious make out session. Trying to plant a kiss by surprise, on the other hand, may result in bumped noses and teeth, a startled pullback, and much awkwardness.
While you shouldn’t try to end the conversation abruptly, which might come across as trying to get over with your goodbyes, you shouldn’t encourage your date to ramble, either. Let the chatter die down by keeping your responses friendly but minimal.
Don’t confuse this with a friendly peck smack in the middle the cheek; make your feelings clear by placing the kiss close to the ear or mouth and letting your lips linger for a second, or whisper something flirty in their ear with lips touching. This will help the other person know that the kiss isn’t meant in a platonic context.
Resist the temptation to kiss hard or with tongue, unless you’ve been chasing this person for quite some time. It might seem too forward and shut down future opportunities.
To know if you’re puckering your lips correctly, kiss in the air. How loud is the kissing noise? It should be a clearly audible “pop” of your lips as you part them while sucking air in. A romantic kiss will barely make this noise because your lips are much more relaxed.
If you’re uncomfortable actually kissing the other person’s skin, try air kissing. Lean in so that your cheek is touching the side of the other person’s cheek, and kiss the air with a few quick and audible puckers. For extra effect, pull back, switch sides, and do it again.
